The Single Change That Made a Difference: The Way I Overcame Post-Work Stress Through an Unexpected Discovery in the Loft

One often feel as tense as a wound-up clock after work. Tension grips my shoulders, my breath turns fast and shallow. Typically, closing my laptop with a thud used to lead to the squeak of a cork pulled from a bottle of red, the wine hastily sploshed into a glass, that initial sip marking the end of the workday.

Then, a few months ago, I discovered my now-adult son’s old school recorder in the attic. Curious, I blew into it, immediately transported back to the days when it drove me crazy – his daily practice a violent assault on my eardrums, the piercing shriek still reverberating through my head long after he slept.

But rather than consigning it to the bin, I took it down, along with a book – Very Easy Recorder Tunes. As a child, I was the least musical child ever. I’d had recorder lessons at infant school, yet never got to try other instruments.

Googling “how to play the recorder”, I viewed many kid-friendly YouTube clips, and printed out a fingering chart. Looking up simple recorder songs, and was thrilled when I managed to knock out a passable Twinkle Twinkle Little Star. Admittedly, a typical young child could learn it quickly, but as a tone deaf, impatient and stressed 51-year-old, it seemed like a major triumph.

My son asked what the hell I was doing (and please could I stop), but I kept going – I liked the way the recorder made me feel. My inability to remember anything forced me to focus on the music sheet, and painstakingly copy the finger positions. My breathing slowed down, my attention sharpened, and once I’d mastered that first faltering tune, I was overjoyed. I had managed to play music.

Now, after some months, I can “play” other nursery rhymes and a decent Ode to Joy. Yes, my rhythm is off, and I still need to write the names of the notes down, but for me, it’s not about skill or being a musician – it is simply about the pleasure it brings and how it clears my mind while playing.

I read that only one in six children learn to play the recorder now, which probably relieves parents, yet it made me wistful for my school years, and my son’s childhood.

I make it a habit to play each night after work as my first activity, and during those 20 minutes, I am in my own little world. And afterwards, I feel refreshed and happy.

My friends think it’s hilarious, but one very wise therapist friend told me I was not only lowering my stress levels, but improving my cognitive skills, such as memory and auditory processing, which is precious at my age. And in terms of my day-to-day wellbeing, it’s truly an ode to joy.